Barber Shop?!!??

Waking up early in the morning and looking in the mirror the first thing serves more than one purpose. One is that you would have no one else to blame for your having a bad day and two is that it’s the best reminder of when you last got a hair cut.

“Your MANE is MAIN” is the mantra of the day with more and more people spending more and more on their hair than anything else. Be it Dhoni with that mangle of hair (don’t forget the color!!) or be it Uppi’s latest visit to the stylist….

No more does the term “barber shop” hold any meaning…it is now “hair saloon”… aarrgghhh….Whatever happened to the friendly neighborhood hajaam!!??!

A hajaam is one who has a knife in his hand and you’re still willing to let him put it to your throat.

A small reminder of my friends experience with the barber…uh…no hair stylist!! When he went there for hair straightening!! (Refer brain dung)

What was that Bollywood movie about a mind reading barber…uhh…the name skips me…I think everybody says I’m fine….well...of course I’m fine!!!

Tracing the history of barbers…

Initially they were nomadic bunch who went around trimming people’s mane in exchange for food. Of course they were more tan willing to exchange… (The barber had a knife at his throat!!)

Then came the small shops with a loud blaring sound system and mirrors on all the walls with shabbily dressed(but with a well trimmed mane and neatly oiled mustachios!!) barbers. The shop would soon overflow with people and all sorts of theories, conspiracies, gossip and what not…and not to forget their hair clippings which would be pushed aside by the barber with amazing footwork displaying such knack and precision that it would give ManU a run for their….uh…ball??!!?

Then came a new breed of barbers….oh! Sorry…”hair stylists” with swanky saloons and bomb shell prices (why... even Sony Cybershot ads are based in saloons!!) This breed of stylists are those whom the celebrities swear by as not only hair style gurus but as their agony aunts, agony uncles, trusted advisors, counselors, human punching bags and what not!! On second thoughts maybe that’s why the bomber prices??! Well so much for the metrosexual male and the sexy female. Long live their clan!!

As for me, the neighborhood barber is all it takes…

Walk in and he asks “yeen saar...yair cutta?? Banni…..oye Saar ge ondu bisi chai haakle...”

Hot chai and a cool cut…

Cheers!

Following a tornado...

When I saw him, he was a towering giant,

Immense in strength and nothing to stop him,

He brought drastic change in lives of all people around him,

Just as a tornado changes a whole city,

Little did I know it would change my life in the same drastic way,

I followed unquestioningly, for years, not knowing where he led me,

Venturing wherever he went,

Ever uncomfortable to step into unknown territory,

Not knowing what to expect, or what lies ahead,

There was no place for thought, only space for action.

He then disappeared into the vast emptiness of space,

Just as night disappears when the sun dawns,

I saw my whole world crumbling,

Not knowing where to go, I stood amidst the ruins,

Confused and lost, I was a dethroned king

Standing amidst the ashes of my palace

Agonizingly trying to bring it back to life

I stared in disbelief at the ruins and what had led me to it,

A single choice it had been….

Realization dawned, I had been mislead,

All those years of ignorance proved to be expensive,

More expensive than years of education!!!!

The call of duty...

The excruciating wait for close to 5 years finally culminating with the presence of a little prefix to the name “doctor”____

I won’t go into what and how of medicine now….

Finally the results came out and clearing would indicate that I became a doctor… (Everyone would be a doctor…….eventually!). The most exciting moment where we would don our new white aprons and dangle a steth proudly around our neck and say hi...Doc! The postings schedule came out and I was posted to the department of community medicine…for 3 whole months. The postings were 45 days of urban postings and 45 days of rural postings in Kaiwara. The three ORC (out reach centers) where we were to be posted were MK Nagar, BK Nagar and Anjanappa gardens. After some higgle haggle with who would attend the rural and urban postings first, we set off to our destinations. I was posted to MK Nagar ORC with a fellow doctor Dr. Varsha.

We were on our own now. We had to find our way to the centre. Though I did have a vague idea of where it was located I knew I couldn’t navigate right on dot. (Pardon me for I’m slightly directionally challenged!). Swallowing that so called male ego of not wanting to ask for directions and inspite of being in a white coat(and that steth hanging around my neck) asked the locals for directions to the decrepit clinic (well, I would love to see the reaction on their faces when they come for treatment!). A short climb on the staircase (with 1 foot high steps and 1 foot wide) we came to a small door….I took a deep breath and entered…..

A PG was sitting there dispensing medicines to a few patients. A strange look crossed the faces of all those patients…for their fate was now to be handled by a newbie Yankee doctor who cared a donkey’s ass about studying for exams. Talk about luck!!!

Maybe I was expecting too much if I hoped that the PG would be there for sometime as a hand holding session or us newbies. Contrary to that she packed and left saying vaguely that the referral forms were here, tabs are here and pointed out to 2 huge gallon sized cans of syrup to dispense at our whims and fancy and gave us a register in which to enter the names of patients.

Now that two of us fresh and crisp right out of the oven docs were stuck in MK Nagar we smiled at our fate and settled down for duty.

I looked around the room; the state of the room is best left to the imagination.

Its about 6 feet wide and 8 feet in length (ahhh...I see jaws dropping!)

Our first patient, a 2 month old infant with some skin eruptions and a respiratory infection. We were basically lost trying to analyze the case. We gingerly prescribed an antibiotic after referring IDR a hundred times (all the time hoping we were right!).

Our second patient was a 35 yr old trader feigning a fever cough and asthma. A bit of prodding and he came up with a list of complaints that left us in a tizzy. I gave him some CPM tablet and he said can I have a few more(brings me to the question of who’s the doctor huh!!?!?)

Managed to get rid of him with some medicine.

Overall it was an experience of how inadequate our knowledge was and how much we were spoon fed that we could not handle a simple case independently. Well my guess is that its just a passing cloud and in a few days we will be baked deep and be confident enough to prescribe any medicine (all morphine and heroin mongers keep away!!).

Life of a candle....

Here's another piece...I wrote this a long time ago....fortunately had a soft copy so saved the trouble of typing this out...

To most maybe all of us a candle is only an object which can be burnt to provide light. Here I have written this article portraying myself as a candle and have only written the thoughts that a candle would have if it ever had a mind and could think as any human being would.

Being a candle is not as easy as it appears to be. My maker poured molten wax into a mould and cooled it along with a thick wick running through the length of my body and this was how I was born. Basically, unlike human beings I am made up of waxes which are a form of fat made up of very long chains of natural acids. The sheer length of these chains disables me from answering chemical reactions for organic acids unlike my smaller cousins (you know acetic acid don’t you???).What pains me is that candles are made to be immobile and we have no freedom to take the shape that we want either by will or by liking.

The candle maker makes us and here we are lying on the shelf of a fancy store. Some candles are even perfumed (so, they smell).People like candles which are perfumed (so, they think) but to us it smells your equivalent of dirty socks and rotten eggs. All of us just hope that somebody buys us because we don’t intend spending a lifetime on some shelf accumulating dust.

Ah, I see a new person entering the store and asking for candles. Each of us has our eyes fixed on the prospective buyer and our hearts pounding (exactly what humans would call an adrenaline surge). Each of us are vying for the buyers attention and try to put on a better show in terms of color ,size ,smell and what not(just like a beauty pageant only that the best one is burnt first Ha, Ha…….).

It sometimes strikes me why any person has not brought me while other candles who arrived at the store more or less the same time as me have already been bought and probably been used already. I began attributing it to my rather plain design and white color and no perfume. Ah, here come more people to buy candles. Oh, my god, I’m so happy that the lady who just entered the store asked the store manager for me, me and only me. Wow!!! I’m exhilarated, I’m being bought and to hell with all those thoughts of not being beautiful. YIPEE!!!!!

We candles as all of you know are rather fragile and may develop a crack even for a minor fall. The store manager is packing me in straw along with a few other candles (my brothers, if I can say so, because they were created by the person who made me).At last I could relax at the thought that somebody has brought me and I will surely be able to give light. I learned quite a lot sitting on the shelf at the store for such a long time. I realized that no matter what happens it is necessary not to lose hope, after all hope is the elixir of life. Also, everyday and every moment is new and things must not take us by surprise. Of course I was happy when the lady brought me but on the other hand I was very anxious that nobody might buy me. However I can now confidently say ‘I dint lose hope’.

On arriving at my new house the lady put me into a cupboard. Now that one hurdle is crossed here comes another………When are we going to be lit????? Anybody reading this might feel why on the world would anybody want their life to end and might say by staying in the cupboard I might retain my youth but I’m sure that life isn’t about sitting around and being cozy, its about taking control of it and my intention in life is to shed light and only on doing so do I have control over my life and I’m sure there is no point sitting in a corner trying to procrastinate the inevitable. All I get by being in a cupboard is dust and dirt and I’m sure I don’t want that in my life. Ah, somebody opened the door; I just hope it’s for us. YES!! It is for us. Being so fragile gives me an opportunity to be ‘pampered’……… My mistress took me and fixed me in a beautiful intricately carved silver candle stand right on top. It made me feel like a king looking at all his subjects. I feel like I’m on top of the world. This is what I was looking forward to and it happened only by keeping the intentions right and this is what has helped me in achieving me what I wanted and I realized that the only thing that matters is the intention.

I suppose I am going to be lit in the evening. I guess the only thing which I want to notice is the strike of a matchstick to light the candle and the noise of the match striking against the box is all that I want to hear. Ah!! I just heard something. Is it the matchstick?????? No!!! It was the noise of the latch on the door. What a disappointment. The problem with having expectations is that it disappoints you when it does not go the way you want it.

The designated hour has come. I’m so excited and I guess so are my companions. My mistress struck the match and protecting the flame in the cup of her hand she slowly approached me and put the flame to the wick. Ah!!! Feels like I’m in heaven. I stood there tall and strong on the highest candle stand and was the first to get lit. What else could I ask for??????

The flame slowly melted the wax and a slight excess poured over the side and solidified forming a design (wow!! a designer dress – even Calvin Klein would be jealous of) the flame is bright and lending light to the place around it. Slowly the flame burns inch by inch of my whole body. The steady flame is sometimes disrupted by a sudden gush of wind through the open window – that hurts; it feels like somebody just kicked you in the head and sends you reeling. GASP!! I almost suffocated with the previous one. The gushes of wind taught me how to fight. Life has many troubles in store and when we struggle out of these and living give more joy and strength than
what is achieved by a life without facing any trouble at all.

I’m nearing the end of my life and I’m happy to have lived it the way I wanted to –
- a way I saw appropriate
- a way I could brighten the lives of all others around me
- a way which brought joy to me and all others around me.
This is my life and I have control over it and this is when I BEGAN LIVING AND STOPPED WISHING………………

Desperation!!

They say what you have to do,
Dominating, thinking they know better than you,
They know more of your life than theirs,
They live in desperation and they regret it on their pyres.

Others say, lead your own life,
Easy to say, but least do they realize that they are leading others lives,
They live their parent’s dreams,
To realize on their deathbeds that it wasn’t their dream.

The mass of people lead lives of quiet desperation,
One among them came over this desperation and came to live his dream,
Others call him a messiah,
I call him HUMAN………